shah, your relationship color is Purple
This means that you tend to be a cooperative, passionate partner who is able to balance your own firmly held beliefs with strong negotiation skills. You're not one to keep that special someone in the dark about your feelings. In fact, you'll usually do your best to fully communicate any emotion you have. Most times you think that it's better to talk frankly and openly about problems or concerns, even if that talk leads to a heated discussion. It can be very important to you to feel comfortable and listened to when sharing your inner life with the one you love. Ordinarily, you'll return this courtesy by listening deeply to your partner's opinions and emotions, as well.
Purples like you have a relationship style that is collaborative but also fiery. So although you may let some smaller problems go without comment, when something really gets under your skin, it's likely that everybody knows about it. Take a pair of Purples, for example: Greg and Jennifer. Jennifer had always felt that Greg was a little impulsive with his purchases, especially when it came to buying new electronic gadgets. However, since these small indulgences made him so happy, she had let them go without comment. However, recently the couple's budget became tighter as the two saved for a down payment on a new house. As a result, Jennifer had been watching both of their spending more closely.
Last week, months after their agreement to begin saving, Jennifer found out that Greg had been selling parts of his coin collection on eBay so he could have a private stash of spending money. Jennifer was so angered by this discovery that her hair practically stood on end. Her temper blew and she began to yell and complain to Greg about how thoughtless and unfair he was being. Greg showed his Purple tendencies, as well, yelling at Jennifer that he was fully within his rights to sell his own things to make a little money on the side.
After an impassioned exchange, the two decided together that it would be best to cool down and approach their problem more rationally. They discussed their feelings openly and soon came to an understanding. It was clear to both of them that Greg hadn't intended to do anything to upset Jennifer. By way of apology, Greg deposited the remainder of his spending money toward their house savings and promised not to keep secret stashes of money in the future. Because both of these individuals are Purples who are willing to argue, but are also focused on working through their problems collaboratively, things worked out all right. In fact, this storm between them vanished as quickly as it began. If they hadn't been so complementary in their communication styles, this incident easily could have become a real roadblock in their relationship.
People tend to develop their relationship styles based on the kind of communication that's been most successful for them in past close relationships. Because one of your first close relationships was with your parents or a parental figure, their communication styles are apt to be the most influential to your development. This doesn't necessarily mean that you'll have the exact same communication patterns as the people who raised you. Some aspects of the way you relate to others may be identical to one or both of your parents. Other aspects may result from the way you needed to relate to them during childhood to get your way. For example, as a Purple, you may have had parents who were also Purples. You also may have learned that the best way to get what you wanted was to negotiate with your parents by understanding their perspectives while being loud and clear about asserting your own.
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